Warning: Climbing is a dangerous, contrived, maddening, silly and potentially illegal activity. Climbing at your crag might require coprophagia or fuscurhinosis. Climbing often results in injury, pain, edema, frustration, cowardice, greed, bad breath, fear, tooth loss, headaches, gum disease, cactus punctures and divorce. Many climbers complain of glossitis, trenchfoot, head lice, yellow toenails, boils, dog bite, painful urination, ticks, scratching, poverty, sinusitis, diarrhea, disorientation, constant erections, frostbite, nerve deadness, funky skin, snake bite, loss of limbs, vaginal dryness, forgetfulness, delusion and indigestion. Avoid climbing if you suffer from radiation sickness, self-flagellation, SBDs, constipation, extra nipples, rotfungus, warts, twitching, excess nose hair, pimples, itching or foot odor. Some studies show that climbing is associated with dandruff, acid reflux disease, cramps, fleas, green ear wax, lobotomy, hairy palms, sweating, hyperactivity, narcolepsy, tremors, mites, worms, lyme disease, baldness and piles. Discontinue climbing immediately if you experience mania, pustules, smegmitis, deafness, mutations, hallucinations, blindness, dissolving earlobes, crunchy underwear, worm-like pimple-tipped articulated growths that exhibit independent movement, impotence, brain lock, spontaneous combustion, painful flatulence, the sensation of a "phantom" third limb, flammable eructation, sentient abdominal tumors, limpness, bedwetting or death.
one climber from Georgia put it, "Climbin's stupid. You gotta be
stupid to climb. If you tell yer Mamma 'I can pull V14' she'll just think
yer stupid; she don't care."
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to be a substitute or replacement for TV, nor should the content of this
site be misinterpreted to imply that TV is in any way bad or that watching
TV is an inferior activity compared to climbing or surfing the Internet.
Huecotanks.com patriotically supports the American invention of Television.
TV Rules! You should consider getting a TV capture device for your computer,
so you can always have a small TV window running in the corner of your
Climb at your own risk; it is far safer for you, and better for mankind, if we all stay home and watch TV.
If, after all these warnings, you STILL insist on climbing, please don't complain to us afterward, or decide that Huecotanks.com is somehow responsible if you crater.